fat hips :P

I'm into the 80's fashion scene, (now what?? 80's fashion and 60's man?? :))) As I strolled down to TopShop and Dorothy Perkin, I was so captivated with the fashions promoted, I bought few skinny jeans/legging (I'm far away from skinny) and went home and parade it, well I'm into my fat hips! never I bothered about them before, its always my bosom, busty, chest breassy me! now I'm madly in love with my fat meaty hips, wow! I'm amazed, self obsesses its not only fat, but I guess its firm in its own way, and I found 1 good reason to flaunt it (no more wide leg jeans, I'm a wide leg jeans devotee!not for this season, maybe :D)

Proudly to acknowledge everyone I'm self obsessed with my fat hips, hooray!!!~~~

Alicia Keys is my driving force to be in love with my super size hips! And other's are the on going thing for me, Kate Hudson, owh, speechless!


inspirations!


the story starts here......

tersenyumku bila warna ceria tiba

kusyukuri cenderamata maha esa -oneitchything

I'm thinking of going out with younger man, I mean boys, yeah... I bet TopShops provides array of the character of my in thing! Boys!

What I've been looking for :

1. tall + lanky
2. in board short and simple t/long sleeve with/cargo pants/shorts
   
3. hair : simple do, messy hairdo
   
4. wears sandals
5. (almost 40mins I failed to figure out what's next?)
6. yeah yeah I've tried at least!

inspiration: Adib (niece) 14, and Ihsan 16, one happy couple, pst: strength, love and passion, cinta budakbudak membawaku pergi jauh, good luck Witni and Bobi, I envy U

hiasan lambang cinta yang terlarang

You told me to meet you at the old KTM station, I'm all plugged with Rick Astley on my playlist. I saw you in your snickers and laid back casuals daily do, what is it? its still working hrs, aren't you supposed to be busy as usual?

Last few days:

me: feeling for for chapathi la today, want chapati want chapati
him: sorry dear I can't I'm berbuka puasa out
me: owh ok suddenly, outside?
him: It's better off if you don't ask why.
him: I wish there's some delivery service, so I can ask them to deliver to you

Our yesterday's cut off, I cant help myself when Im with you, I start to pull you off, we are standing overlooking the Corinthian big brick wall, the scenic the silence, the moment vow my hunger towards you. I wished to rip more than your clothes more than your skin, bare you off, no love no happy ending, only streaming endless lust and passionate kisses,

I'm all bruised when you tongued me, we left each other with no words no nothing but bruised that tattooed each other in varies way . I've promised I will never look back and say goodbye because I'm hungry for more

(Day 3)

"I'm feeling guilty and you well aware, but you don't look ashamed
and baby I'm not scared"

I've stupidly threw my sim card, so I'm not able to call you and you wouldn't able to reach me, I left you with the best memoir we've shared within days... You're the cancer in me

small dots

me: tqs for the flower/fruits/teddy bear/biscuits and milkkkkkkkkkkk
him: I sayang U, I just want you to be happy
me: yeah yeah yeah
me: U malu tak?

• i gemuk
• pakai baju color coding salah
• mata selalu merah
• comot
• would u want to hold my hand
• i pakai tudung, senget2, annoyingly
  

me: would u want to kiss/do smooches with me?
him: why not?
me: kiss me in the public? hold my hand?
him: didn't have any reason why I shouldn't
-------------------------------------------------------------

me: I dont want to go on /pursue in our friendship anymore, tq bye!
him: is it? oh ok! Take care, have a nice day!
me: you u stop saying u sayang I?
him: oh cause I thought u'r leaving
me: will i be forgotten?
him: no
me: did I hurt u?
him: honestly, yes
me: I know
me: when I'm in the "mood" can I call? and do meet up and kiss u?
him: yeah sure
me: hey I like you!
him: I like you
me: can I meet you within this week
him: sure!
****************************

1. he is the man who gives flowers/food/teddy bear/handwritten notes
2. listen to jazz
3. wear snickers on weekdays
4. everything that came out from his mouth makes me laugh/happy
5. he runs to the hospital just to hand in his hand written note to me
6. naughty
7. pious
8. old
9. make me wanting more of him
10. bad boy
11. does terawih!!!
12. tak gemuk tak kurus, sedang2,taller than me..grrrrr
    

• honestly im craving for him
• at the end of the day he is the one who is the-tak-boleh-pakai-man
• irresistible
  
• im crazy over him
• i said stupid things around him
• i guess i have to let him go
• good thing, but bad to keep
• biar gurauan seluruh cintamu ku dakap dalam tidur panjang ku
• everyday im thinking of kissing him
• he drugged me in so many ways
• nak peluk plssssss
• I'm praying daily to ask god to take him off from me
• cant take this anymore
  

mahu itu

1. suka bila dia tak ada dan saya tak perlu fikirkan pasal dia
2. nak duduk di celah kelangkang kecil dia
3. nak dengar dia panggil orang lain sayang tapi hati dia pada saya

but?

everyone/everybody: U are wasting time, too much, focus

1. U need to meet your therapist
2. we miss the "old" you
3. how come 1 boy get 3 sections spread in your blog
4. 1 man 1 column 1 boy 1/2 column, enough la~
5. detox please
6. massage your brain please
7. enough of cheap love scene
8. black nail polish please instead of au natural
9. go and see your Dr.A he is hungry for U
10. read my lips "S T O P W A S T I N G T I M E S"
11. stop avoiding man
12. those "phone's key chain" is so YESTERYEAR ok!
    

Me: i'll try *smile* + *cough*

• I'm in between "this and that"
  

rescue me

*I should start doing my Hygiene assignment, should be compiling articles about infection caused by Fresh Meat, should be ~*

mother: our sanak saudara about 15 of them will be dropping by to visit yr nenek *she suffered from bone brittles and out and about from SMC*

me: ok -gosh must be asking about marriage,families,career,driving license and job-

24 hrs, sleepless night, long hour on the phone, hogging here and there = fallen asleep 4 hrs, woken up half dead for my mobile phone ::
me: hello deary, rescue me now now now, haven't done any showering, brushing still fresh from last night sweats

deary: ok! Im around yr house, ready for Transformers??

me: what ewerrrrr...

Pack my wide leg jeans, cardigan, singlet and other la la la, off to deary house...

as usual, 30 minutes before the climax of Transfo. I slept and wakes up 30 min before the ending! :) Covered in popcorn and among the less-hottest Yam Meh bOys and some Lelaki Melayu, I'm fine, my sleepless night is being replenish under the bone chilling coldness of Bkt Tgi's theater!...
After lunch at Boston, with my bloating tummy, off we goes for minor shopping, clothes too tight for me, accessories? too much making me bigger than everyone! YES YES YES,cosmetics, beauty products.. let see something from Skin Food ke Food Therapy ke can't remember but the product owh superb beb!

I'm having food on my skin, instead in my tummy, ah ha so healthy yeah, (wedding and engagement invitation stresses me up, giving chemical reaction to my skin and my hair, I'm so pre Britney Spears)

dirrrtyyy and yummy slurpsss...
-in a coffee cups kind of thingy, mix the cocoa powder and the honey leavening agent and slather on my face wallaa, got me licked up!-

all left to do is run!

ive missed several therapy session, today I made my comeback, need another mental and physical test, it turn out sucks!...

Therapist: what happen to your result..
Me: indiscipline!
Therapist: lack of recovery time, too stress out, bad diet, irregular therapy session
Me: ya ya ya too many "W" invitation that sicken me out *saying under my breathe*
Therapist: pls sleep early tonight pls pls pls, make it at 9 or b4 11
Me: ROFL, get a life MR!

Walking to Subang Parade + crying, not bothering some hot uncle, felt bad ugly and worthless in my PJs,

drop by at Body Shop SP *need to shop in order to pump my self esteem back*, greeted by some unruly overly make up mammal wearing whatever sarong! give me that 5 cent looks,
I end up buying something with orange container, something that can bring my youthfulness back in minute ha ha ha...shopping is a treatment too!! End up buying unintended goods, such as facial mask at Elianto and make up remover :P

p/s: wearing facial mask in the car, acting like after-facelift-nosejob-me, actually its a tribute to JACKO!!
p/s: no paparazzi pls! TQ!
p/s: im ok now, a lil sour but creamy meeee!

terbalik seluruh duniaku!

it's been a hectic week, a.m-p.m kitchen session, sleepless night getting the cookies ready for the charity sale. The nerves is ticking nervously, sleep is just an action without feeling, but it turn out superb, here I would thank : *im head over heel about my baby project*

Cik Mat

-For the superb cake recipes

my family monopoly
- for everything

CikSu
-for giving me the courage from an ID to someone who are involves in cooking (chef is too cheffery ok!!)

V E S
- the ideas, the mutual strength tq tq tq

The sale easily went off, cakes sold in minutes some in second, during the cake testing this lady make an on the spot order for her function on that night itself!!!.. phewww
I survived 2 huge cakes using my small oven (trust me a lot like the size of an A3 paper*not that wide*) phewww, the result is superb, the final product and the comment is beyond average...

p/s: I think he likes me and I think I like him too...
p/s: sedapnya hati tidak jemu tak sabar bermanja hanya sehari tak bertemu macam selamanya...
p/s: aku terseksa dengan sendu bila engkau jauh, aku bermimpi riang terbang pagi sampai senja
p/s: cinta dihati sudah kembang untuk engkau saja - sampai terbalik seluruh duniaku
p/s: my mistake too much dream on the spot.. ahahah
p/s: bila ku layu lagi sedih

miss u like candy

1. I miss u all :))
2. absolutely busy classes/kitchen
3. nervous about going public abt my food
4. nervous nervous
5. busy busy with orders...
6. miss u ppl muahssssssss
7. sex is a big miss...
   

lifeless motionless

i got no feeling, i'm trying to gain my feeling as much as possible, it irritates me badly about my no-feeling-feeling... My therapist asked to see him as often as possible, my feeling graph drop drastically. The shaman who gives spiritual helps is trying his best to help. Ive lost interest in getting to know ppl, attending public function la la la la etc.
My friends is helping too.. good luck to everyone.. Im losing the will to feel :P

King Jamil

I'm stressed because King Jamil will be taking over my class and he is super professional and I'm unable to peel ubi keledek properly woohooooooooooo I'm superstar stress!!
King Jamil (no idea about this uncle, but as he was telling about his so called life experience, my heart's racing faster and I'm no longer sleeping !)

• Sultanah (is it right?) Bolkiah's master cook,
• personal cook for the king's
• cook for M.Jackson and Whitney Houston (la la la)
• airline's cook
  
• worked all around the world
• with 5 * hotels and resorts
• senior chef
• alim / pious
• strictttttttttttttttttt habes wa cakap beb
• well known as an underground chef
  
• not popular but dangerously popular (silent killer)
• I'M PANIC AND SCARED with his TAG LINE (pantas cekap amanah - PCA) woahh amanah mungkin boleh tapi lagi 2 ...tak pernah tercapai
  
• pet name : King Jamil

p/s: I don't want to goggle him, not now maybe later way much later, need to learn him by heart 1st

Just stand up

Location: KL Central (Commuter waiting area)
Time: 1830
Date: Today
Cast: ME as the main doer!.. others passengers!!
Costume: college uniform (baju kurung white top + black bottom + black Bata's) + iPhone

I have to take the other 16 mins arrival train, because the current train is jammed pack, ok ok I can obey that! When the train arrived I don't have to hop on people kept pushing, well hello the rule is U have to let "them" out first, it'll make easier for "us" to go in!!! but no one seems to be so greedy/tired/selfish and kept pushing, I dont have to walk people kept pushing and indirectly they are pushing my abilities and my anger not knowing that I have my Syafawi Quranic exam in 1hr time and im having my PMS!!!

So people kept pushing ~ :D as I tried to control my depression towards whatever (read my previous entree) I open my mouth and shouted

NO PUSHING PLEASE, FOR SAFETY REASON!!!!!!!!!!! loud and clear, and people stops! and I felt embarrassedly proud of myself (im standing tall) The area is finally clear, and I know that mamat with the topman carrier + wedding band amused with my ability to shout!.. and that mamat with Fitness 1st bag wish he could ask for my number rather than staring at my playlist!!

There are time when pushing is needed

1. birth
2. sex
3. constipation
4. in danger
5. low self esteem
6. etc but not when u r selfish!
   

p/s: finally the lioness has spoken
p/s: never judge this person by the pink iPhone and unruly uniform
p/s: I bitterly roar
p/s: readers U should feel happy U are the 1st person to know about my ACHIEVEMENT for peace and safety!!! (dont dare to tell my parent - )
p/s: for the meaning of freedom, therapist needed

left unwritten

in few days time I have to drag myself to go back to my hometown *grrrrrrrreatttt suckkkaaaaaa*my cousin is getting -her own cage- / getting married *sigh* my bro and his family will be on the road with us too, so its a crowd, I haven't attended any wedding this year as I promise to myself its a sober year *yeah backoff with wedding veil or wedding bells la la la* - will only attend if ~-(don't know, no reason to attend) worst the night off my arrival from my hometown, next week, I'd be having my kitchen training (can U imagine? after hours of driving and the need of having sex with flour and butter!)
This reservation to snatch me off the trip has been going on since January : so here goes

My auntie/the bride : pls come to my wedding, it'll be nothing without U
Me : Yeah righttttttttt... (upon god's will)

-------------------------

My mum : U r coming with us right?
Me : to ??????
My mum : Nazra's wedding
Me : U know I don't attend wedding right right right

---------------------------------

My eldest niece (Buncah)
Buncah : it'll be fun
Me : dude u know how i hate weddings
Buncah : so ok we'll stay in, we'll have fun ...
Me : im in too,
Buncah : awsome
Me : i know u know the best!!!!!

So we'll be bringing our :

1. psp
2. xbox
3. our projector for movie/games/karaoke viewing
4. our traveling karaoke set
5. bitchy beachy beach attire
6. surfboard
7. mags and books
8. laptops
9. BAGS of our moody moods ( me and Buncah have attitude problem, she doesn't like crowded area, and I dun like weddings)
10. couple of Q n A sheets of practiced answer upon some silly bossy annoying questionnaire
    

(This is during crucial times and I some how or rather, me existence needed around the wedding ceremony)

Q : badan naik eh?
A : tak (blah)

Q : ehehehe awak bila lagi??
A : Lepas raya korban (terus blah) -tahun bila dengan siapa? left unanswered)

Q : dah kerja ke?
A : dah (terus blah)

Q : dah boleh bawak kerete ke?
A : baru je boleh (ahahhaha - blah)

Q : apa jadi kat budak lelaki yang dulu bawak balik kg tuh?
A : yang mana satu? lupa sudah (blah)

Q : eyyy nampak kurus sikit
A : haah kurus (blah)

Q : takkan takde lagi calon2 kot
A : ramai
Q : dah tunggu apa lagi, kawin je la terus
A : tak tahu nak pilih mana satu
Q : ala. takkan takdak yang berkenan
A : takdak (blah)

urghh I don't like this, what make me attend this wedding? even Zamarul Hisham and Diana Rafar send me their wedding card I refuse to attend
Why I'm doing this?? because it's a nitemareeeeee, i cant breathe i cant sleep i wakes up earlier than i should... Im stress I need my therapist and he's out of my reach for a week, im stuck I cant do so many things, I disliking my dislikes Im crumpling.... feel like fighting ...
Honestly I need to admit myself to the emergency room... therapist needed!

Happeyh Burpday!!!!

wooahoooo, since I'm a kitchen freak + stop working for good + no firm income = I have to be creative in order to celebrate any occasions with my love ones, no money with love type kind of gift + effort ~ (T_T)

Deeb, for U I will dear, py burpday yeah!!..

Happy B'day to Fierce Tasya too!

p/s: for Lish's cupcake on 20th May 09 (Chocolate + Banana with Peanut Butter + Frosting)
p/s: Tasya's cake (whoever inspired face) -Butter creamed spongecake + Vanilla with chocolate ganache) tq

if u ever know

if u ever know what I'm doing isn't something easy for me to face or even do. Its really hard, even harder for the one who facing it. I dont have any link to channel this anymore

corny me!

I'm tired, I woke up with slow paced heart yet my mind is rushing, I'm angry, angry for nothing~ Is this something that got to do with the activity or emotional activity done before I'm off to bed??
I realized ever since I've stop teaching at the kindergarten I've becoming someone who is easily snapped off/short tempered and whatever my opinion given leads to "do I look like I care?" attitude! (ahah not really yesterday I stayed longer @ college just to help Chingy understanding new-learn topic = FLOUR, owh yeah to be noted, I re-write the notes back for her)
Last night I dreamed~

Location : my present college

scene : I'm about to throw my fully eaten corn cob (is a COB right, gahh) As I throw the corn off, I overheard one of the girl seated at the table nearby commented about me to her friends "perasan baik" Than I ran to her table and said "weh, ko mengata aku ehs??" and directly I pulled her of her sit and twists her neck and punched her right to her face, I even slammed her head (how comforting eyh!!) and I told myself "what should I do?" the result is I throw her off into the dustbin where all the Corn Cobs lay rested.
Soon after the incident I tried to tell my mum, I've cried in my dream telling myself I need to see my therapist and begged my mum to send me to any therapist available.

p/s: I've canceled my therapy session earlier on

pertama dalam pertama

Percaya atau tidak, hari ni adalah hari pertama aku gunakan/naik perkhidmatan BAS/BAS AWAM! ahahha kelas habis awal so aku ngan Chingy naik bas!





(Bas)

1. super best hampir orgasm dengan kebesaran cermin bas
2. one day aku nak duduk kat kerusi tinggi/dekat ngan pemandu bas
3. kali 1 pegang tiket bas
4. salah cucuh duit *nasib baik abang bas hensem bangat tolong - tolong gelakkan juga*
5. seronok abang bas usher keluar bila sampai kat Taman Bahagia (ekceli dia nak cek side mirror ajer) *tp dia babai laa kat aku*
6. suka semua orang membantu CHINGY n BangBas esp!!!
   

(Komuter)

1. Slow nak mampos
2. 2-3 kali tukar arrival schedule
3. KALI pertama aku sound orang dalam komuter
   

keadaan berasak-rasak @ pintu kecik, kakak neh dah kedepan sempat pulak

Kakak : eh eh (panggil kawan) cepatla2 pegang tangan masuk,
Aku : Hallo, jalan2 bf biar dulu, kasi aku masuk dulu *sigh* -Honestly bila aku pakai Chef Suit, aku takde masa nak cuci mata nak baik2 dengan sapa2, unless cacat/mengandung-

(Poliklinik kajaan)
Woah hensem mamat neh, walaupun jalan macam baru lepas bersunat, ngan sua pendek + kain plekat kat tangan *kiut nye pasal I dun care* Berdiri sebelah aku plak tuh... Tiba2 ade plak minah neh dok pegang bahu dia, ceh! should I or shouldn't I kasi dier duduk, walaupun dia sakit..

Aku : argh mampos la awek ada, suruh la awek tuh riba ke papah ke timang ke.. pangku ke..*ROFL*

p/s: at times I'm proud to be selfish n rude p/s: is good to be Malay written my blog, puas hati nak maki dan berkesat kesatan...

good Job!

Description:RELEASE DATE : 2009

Anak Aku Artis!

8-May-2009, 10:00:00 PM

Genre: Drama

Language: Bahasa Malaysia

Cast: Mimi - Dina ERA

Synopsis:

Anak Mak Lang Nak Jadi bintang menceritakan Mak Lang yang mempunyai seorang anak bernama Mimi yang ingin menjuarai tancangan realiti tv Akademi Bintang. Tetapi cita-citanya terbantut apabila Mimi terkeluar sebelum pertandingan akhir. Mak Lang memerlukan wang kemenangan untuk membayar pinjaman teksi yang disewanya. Kini Mak Lang terpaksa memikirkan jalan untuk mendapatkan wang tersebut. Kebetulan hakim rancangan realiti tv Ikmal menaiki teksinya, lantas Mak Lang mengambil keputusan untuk menulik Ikmal bagi memastikan anaknya Mimi diserap semula ke dalam rancangan realiti tersebut. Maka berlakulah pelbagai insiden lucu untuk memastikan cita-cita Mak Lang menjadikan anaknya juara tercapai.

Stuck at home on Sunday evening, done myself for all the heavy breathing movie such as City of Angels, etc ~ Switched on to Ria @ Astro and watched Anak Aku Artis, an indie spirited movie + Juno-kinda-like-it, whatever it is, I think the plot/storyline and the combo of artists used in this drama balanced and coherent with "today's" viewers esp. Ppl like me!
I'm over plastic heroine/hero and bad looking intruders, I want something "real" out of the box. Ghaz, the producer uses a good graphically idea such as using "collage" as part of the medium in the drama. Ha ha ha I know one day Ghaz able to come out with something "at heart" for our "new-malaysian-viewers" (Im excited!!!)

p/s: I've called Ghaz's colleague to congratulate upon his achievement!!
p/s: Ghaz's is the man behind most of Anuar Zain's mtv
p/s: Yeah I've worked with Ghaz for sev times!
p/s: He borrowed my trackmill to be used in Kaer's mtv!
p/s: I'm bragging !!!

buddy o o o buddy ~

One of my f-buddy IM me, yeah done with hi and hello, he hits me at the right time ..

Hey! how's life and la la la ~ I'm ynroh (:D) can we have xes??

(mission accomplish!)

I still can't sleep, and tomorrow is rehab session and worst, my body is about to be tested/weigh/alcohol/fat/bmi/urine (and u name it, they will dig me) Logged on the net and do some minor chatting and met few of the 95-97 Alamakians and walked the memoir lane together (arghh) I remember those days where cyber sex is clearer than the blue sky, each words typed is a sonnet, we are strangers yet we are so into cyber sex an its not a taboo as its done today!! (what am I?? standard 6??) We emailed each other at HOTMAIL.COM and its a love letter between us and just like hand written letters, words rhyme and harmonized, that was the day when we used too woo each other using songs and lyrics (ENOUGH!!!)

• 4.00 a.m + mug of Milo + 2x bahulu + midnite call from Randy = able for a nap
• 730 a.m = wake up wake up, rehab time!!!! (Should i or shouldn't I attend my therapy session??)
• Since entering rehab, I've plastered my walls/doors/surfaces with wisdom's/motivational/lyrical phrases/words just to motivate me to move and attend my therapy session!!! (even after 3-3.5 hrs sleeping) YES, I took my bath and off to rehab zombifiedly!!!!!!!

@ Rehab..

I dun like(zombie shouldn't be kind to any) this lady who I think she thinks herself is super-hot (which i dun think soooo) and miss-know-it all,worst ! she is the receptionist (there are others too, but she always makes the beeline over whatever!!) blahhh

She's being nice and greeted me : "Awak nampak letih sangat muka tuh"
Me: Smiles and "yeahh yeah yeah" can U check my therapist my session is at 9 a.m (bed and food needed)
therapist: what happen to U??
Me: sex sex sex - chatting - game = sleepless nite (untold of course!) "hurm, something happened last nite and I didn't manage to sleep well"

hey hey hey ~ I went thru my 1.5 hrs session bravaaaaaaaaaaaaaa to me pls!!! Went home for my fruity loops + cereals + soya + 5hrs sleep

p/s: the heart can beat the hate

brekkie!!!

BIG BREAKFAST...anybody???

p/s: I'm horny = too descriptive

kerusi kosong~

Something that came out of nowhere...

Scene - Lec. Room 6, front row (class Pn. Fiza : Hygienic n Sanitation sub.)
Cast - me, ain LEFT-i + ain LEFT-i's mineral water + kerusi kosong
Genre - blur sotong... (ROFL)

I sat in between Ain LEFT-i and kerusi kosong

Ain LEFT-i : Kak, tadi orang call kenapa tak angkat tepon

Me : gah, tak perasan

(sambil pegang mineral water...)

Ain LEFT-i : (angkat botol mineral) nak air??

Me: (pandang, kiri) *dalam hati* woah, sebelah aku kosong dia cakap ngan sapa?? offer sapa air?? *aku meroma!* berantuuuuuuuuuuu ke??

Me: erkkkk no tq,

- Lama2 aku tenung si Ain LEFT-i neh baru aku perasan mata kiri dia JULING....

p/s : tq Ain niat ko baik dik!

butterfly

Never felt any better, thanks to Ciksu and some others who soothed me thru my 1st day @ college. Friendless, I don't know anyone, I didn't look around, not wanting to know anyone, scared to look around in case, there's-the-cutie and he will be the attraction core.
Arghh, I didn't go to the loo, I waited till lunch time. We were place in the dimmed lighting mini theater, I misplaced my reading glasses earlier on, so I manage to notice the others only during the last period of the orientation, well well well as I'm assuming they are all babies!!!!!! woahhh freshies from high school!..hurm they are extremely funny, the fact that they're around, calm me down~
Well, I bought my B-First black school shoes! weyhh I felt younger at wrong places... ahaah save me!! I felt I'm stuck in some underages' , wohoo help me!

Back to school !!!

Never felt worse for years since I left college, here I'm back to pieces after years leaving college/freshman/dating/into-you/assignment/dudes/babes gahhhh I'm into it again, tomorrow!.. The worst part is:

1. Uniform included
2. white top with black trousers
3. anything with white turn me off
4. VEST is included = looking like over stuff waitress @ some cheap hotel
5. I have to carry my own "Kad Metrik"
6. orientation
7. those unknown
8. NO ONE
9. lonesome
10. miss my students
11. UNIFORM (fugly) againnnnnnn
12. 1 of my ex-bf used to study at the same college (Luckily, I'm not into him ah ha)
13. he's history
14. books + reading
15. I'm having bad flu
16. reschedule rehab session (gahhh)
17. middle of nowhere
18. tons of MISS ATIE-to be-wannabe-act alike (ciksu if u read ths!) arghh

Some starlight!

1. I got to tailor made my own CHEF suit
2. wearing SAFETY boots
   
3. checkered pants
4. CHEF-to-be
5. new crowd of people
6. something got to do with ASIAN CULINARY INSTITUTE
7. young at one again!
   
8. something new
9. ok laaa...
10. I will do my best ok...
    

Laugh it off let it go (=====D)

Not Fair - Lily Allen

Oh, he treats me with respect,
He says he loves me all the time,
He calls me 15 times a day,
He likes to make sure that im fine,
You know I've never met a man,
Whose made me feel quite so secure,
He's not like all them other boys,
They're so dumb and immature.

There's just one thing,
That's getting in the way,
When we go up to bed your just no good,
its such a shame!
I look into your eyes,
I want to get to know you,
And then you make this noise,
its apparent its all over

Its not fair,
And i think your really mean,
I think your really mean,
I think your really mean.

Oh your supposed to care,
But you never make me scream,
You never make me scream,

Oh it's not fair,
And it's really not ok,
It's really not ok,
It's really not ok,

Oh your supposed to care,
But all you do is take, yea all you do is take

Yewell I lie here in the wet patch in the middle of the bed
I'm feeling pretty hard done by, I spent ages giving head
then I remember all the nice things that you've ever said to me
maybe I'm just overreacting, maybe your the one for me

there's just one thing that's getting in the way
Not Fair lyrics on
http://music.yeucahat.com/song/English/51978-Not-Fair~Lily-Allen.html
when we go up to bed you're just not good it's such a shame
I look into your eyes I want to get to know you
and then you make this noise and its apparent it's all over

it's not fair and I think your really mean
I think your really mean
I think your really mean

oh your supposed to care but you never make me scream
you never make me scream

oh it's not fair and it's really not ok
it's really not ok
it's really not ok

oh your supposed to care but all you do is take
all you do is take

there's just one thing that's getting in the way
when we go up to bed you're just not good it's such a shame
I look into your eyes I want to get to know you
and then you make this noise and its apparent it's all over

it's not fair and I think your really mean
I think your really mean
I think your really mean
oh your supposed to care but you never make me scream
you never make me scream

oh it's not fair and it's really not ok
it's really not ok
it's really not ok
oh your supposed to care but all you do is take
all you do is take

p/s: Seek Professional Helps!

tata??

sex is just sex, lifeless
checked into rehab, will be flying off for a cuppa... :P

my bad

due to jam packed schedule, agendas and other domestic crisis I've delayed my sex-lunch-quickie, dang! I've lost my f**** buddy, as the show begin, I have to answer an important call, by the time I finished he's gone, and I'm left feeling 'hungry' - Worst I'm about to meet my personal trainer...

I can't help myself from staring at the bulgy bulging bulge... aaaaaaaaaaa help me, need to be trained, my body! not my eye!!!!!

hence I'm zombified, left. leaving 'hungry' and pressured ... wohooo

trainer:: come on come on

me:: what?? kemut?? kemut?? (LOST)

powerless

I'm sober, badly, I'm counting days to leave, my happiness, my students, for a new stanza of joy, for something more promising... I'm paralyse, fail to orgasm...

April ??? who???

text msg from whoever, date 1st April, Rabu

sms : Hey semua orang, dengan persetujuan kedua belah pihak, keluarga saya (belah lelaki) telah setuju untuk menyatukan saya dan gf saya, minta maaf kerana last minute beritahu U all semua, sapa yang tahu jemput la hadir (SOMETHING LIKE THAT LA, hell! I can't remember all)

me : SAPA NI???

sms : I laaaa...kawan U

me : Ye la kawan mana satu??

sms : APRILLLLL FOOL.....

me : ??? tak kenal, sorry!

p/s - Honestly I can't remember who is he/she..until this moment, I fail to track who is this whoever....

weak

( I makes him weak and he makes me even weaker.. huhuu ) Yesterday I went to KLCC's Cold Storage to purchase my greenies, Arugula, Sweet Basil and other designer's salad, instead of hopping 2 trains to Mid Valley, it was a plain-normal day, to spice things up I called up this guy who I happen to know for the past 3 days and set a date together its an after thought thingy ~

(things that makes me thinking, "am I a dude??" macho/cool dude??)

• i arrives earlier than him
• i eat sour cream + onion bagel, without bothering the after smell
• i left the 'meet-me-spot' because he was late
• ask him to come and find me after 8 unanswered calls *he's cuckoo*

Well thats a starting point I guess...

1. he came wearing an oversize Polo, (that shirt must be a machine washed cause the length almost hits his knee *my goodnesssssssss*
2. i suggested we go for movie cause I can't ran away after a 5 min hi and hello
   
3. he was teeth clattering in the cinema cause its too cold, he kept saying he's cold, I hardly bothered him cause I sinfully attaching myself with a bucket of popcorn *to warmth me up darlinggg*
4. after the 3rd time he kept repeating the same thing I finally answered "HEY, DO YOU WANT ME TO HOLD YOUR HAND?" (Wooohoo my mankind is being challenged ahhahah can u sense my testrogen adrenaline that streams in me?)
5. he agreed and I held his bony hand
6. bought my greenies which I proudly tell u out there "I'm plasticless and I'm purchasing the GO GREEN bag from the supermarket, its a kiss ass thingy for me" wohoooo
7. I said goodbye and keep him to 'rest'
   
8. MY GOD!!!
   

tatih-tatih sepi

terima kasih, terima kasih ini besar, kebesaran yang ditunjuk walaupun sekelip mata, walaupun kurang dari masa yang mengambil masa, sudah cukup memberi kesan kepada diri yang suatu masa bergelimpangan riang di ruang galaksi yang akhirnya merentap segala nikmat yang tumbuh di celah-celah tapak kaki mereka yang tak disangka.
Nikmat itu jua kembali tanpa disedari, datang pasti dariNYA melalui "mereka" yang juga tak disangka bisa membawa~
Kaki yang pernah berpijak digalaksi tua dunia ini ditarik nikmatnya, sekelip mata, cinta antara usia hilang, bait-bait suara berirama berentakkan nafsu juga sayup jauh tidak kedengaran, apa yang ada suatu pertanyaan, keadilan diri yang tak berkesempatan terfikir untuk bersuara sudah jauh meninggalkan. Akibatnya, diri tenggelam, hilang, hilang habis segalanya, tiada segala indah fizika yang suatu masa di agungkan di pelbagai corong telinga, sentuhan panas yang automatisnya bisa memanaskan segala yang berdarah tanpa tulang, urat-urat merih yang cair di atas lidah di hujung jari juga sudah dikelasifikasikan sebagai "DULU" ~
Dimana diri ketika itu? ranap? hancur? lebur, malah cair didalam kecairan akibat panas yang tak dileraikan.... tak ada lagi jati diri ini, hanya bisa merodok kekunci abjad berlapiskan air masin diri, malu, manis itu tidak, malah masin itu bertambah kelat, payau. Mengheret kuderat yang tak pasti, membina kembali dasar asal dimana keagungan tercipta hanya dengan sepatah ayat bersandarkan suara yang akhir membawa kecamuk si pemuja, adakah ini akhir diri, memakan diri ini??
Berpuntung-puntung kali membakar diri, tak bertali putus liang mata mengalirkan derus teras air mata, hanya untuk mencari jawapan atas kehilangan yang mengjanggalkan diri, biar ia hanya satu rahsia tapi sejauh mana diri ini bisa menanggung rahsia yang akhirnya membusut di segelumang gumpalan daging yang mungkin tiada sinar putih malah kelam berpudarkan celoreng palsu yang pernah ditoreh demi bahagia si pemuja ......................

RAHMAT!!

rahmat,

esok (khamis 12/3) jumpa di KL CENTRAL dalam 1-145, di Mc Donald. Sorry setelah borak lebih masa aku tlupa nak save no kau, aku dah korek merata hp, tp satu trace no kau pun tak ada, so aku tawwakal la cari kau, aku harap kau bangun la, tapi kalau ko takde dalam lingkungan waktu yang di tetapkan, aku gerak g KINO- KLCC, cari buku....

aku tahu kau nak jumpa aku, so harap ko baca la posting neh, tak tahu mana lagi nak contact ko, kalau ko sampai, ko (slalu takde credit) ko guna la telefon awam.. ok ok ok....

c u when i c u...

unfortunately me

Wasn't all prep to fly back here in KL, told my parent we should come back during the school break but she insisted because my nanna wanted to be in KL badly, so Im all joy and pack my suitcase and other essentials... and everything seems fine untilllll ......

Scene 1
-------------------------------
I arrived with my dad 1st and my mum and others were in other car, and everything look fine I enter my house graciously saying salam, and telling them (my households) that I miss them badly, and dash to my room, jeng jeng jenggggg I open my door which I strongly remembered that I locked each of my bedroom doors, but how come I can push it open when it should be locked? Amazingly, my upgraded desktop with the accessories (keyboard,mouse pad and such) wasn't there anymore, danggg! me got robbed! Our house wasn't being scattered or trash (as in movie, burglarized house was pictured) it's all kept in place.
Ok I inform my dad, and told my mum to be calm as I told her house is robbed~ I'm calm ...
I called Anna my beloved *so far* neighbour and she came and be with us la la la la la la

Scene 1.1
-------------------------
Hours after exploring what are those taken

1. complete set of my desktop + Internet modem
2. 2 pails
3. 2 new bought pillows
4. nanna's tote bag inclusive bed spread, duvet, and nanna's fav face cloth
5. some of my bundle bought tee

Yeah they didn't manage to take my Astro decoder, my dvd player, I don't know why~ attacked my room! yay!... (come on la my unit is on the 8th floor) and they escaped from my dry yard, they dared themselves to death for my DESKTOP *upgraded of course!!* gahhhh~ We asked our beloved neighbour to accompany my nanna and maid (both are helplessly scared) while we were off to the nearby LAPD (police station ok)

It took 'them' minutes to type a simple, a paragraph of statement which I guessed is a template-ready thingy!! LOL, what happen to them?? can't they jot down it fast, can they answered the phone later? and assist my entourage 1st (we are mildly traumatized and tired and hungry) ~ As we are asked to meet the other cop on the 1st floor, it such an unfriendly situation - environment - staff, I was asked to do a complete (a bad repetitive activity) report in a 6' by 12' room accompany with 2 officers and other whatever crime victim and there is a big tv which is switched on to the reality show and its fucking blaring loud, IT SUPPOSED to be a police station not a GHOST HOUSE come CHEAP MOTEL come POLICE STATION , honestly darling It scares me more than what happen back than in my UNIT~~ ;((

Scene 1.2

---------------

Hrs of waiting and it's almost 1 a.m (Im settle in my bra and panties) to tired to think and off to sleep in my robbed room, careless, I've touched and disturbed the rodent area, since I photographed the disturbia scene earlier on. I'm close to doze off when the bell rung, and there I'm sexily *I guessed* covered in my tiniest blanket to address the photographer from the police dept.

me: woah lambat nya datang

him: banyak kerja

me: tunggu la nak pakai baju

him: (padan muka menunggu)

He came in less than 10 min and off settling other cases, no finger prints taken, no detailing and so on, my case was taken shallow, just because no one died the CSI wasn't well performed *GAH*~ He snapped my front wall, and I asked what is it for, and he answered It's important to him (I DONT KNOW ppl ACTUALLY ADMIRED MY BABY BLUE PAINTED WALL) *dun be shy dear inspector u r not the first)

Scene 2 (next day) -BEST PART-

------------------

it's a public holiday my parent off to do *i dont know* and I'm asked to look after my maid and nanna *WHY??* so soon after I'm dead lost without my PC and other gadget, I choose to sun bathed and swim in the mid mildly heat afternoon, went on swimming for 3 hrs. There are multiracial swimmers in the pool ok ok ok ~

Then this INDIAN guy and his Philippines friend came and approach me and we start talking,laughing la la la (thanks to my Quicksilver's rashey and my tank kini) and after 2 hrs waiting to pee I choose to climb out and off to the loo, and on my first step at the stairs I slipped off and fell bum-on-the-stairs-1st-dying-moment, and got up painfully and continue my journey to the loo (LUCKILY NO ONE NOTICE, I'M VOLUPTUOUSLY FAST!)

and I painfully CONTINUE flirting IN THE POOL and acted like NOTHING HAPPEN!!!wooahoo

He took my number and I painfully happily off the pool, and soon after an hour sleep in I finally can't properly sit and bend, in a panicking situation I confessed to my parent, and I was asked to meet my manly orthopedist the next day for a detailed check up (I'm fucking scared that I'll be paralyzed) - YES YES YES that guy texted me !! yay!

Scene 3??

-----

Took an emergency leave and head to the hospital, well dressed was wearing a grammy awards-looking-skirt. I walk like someone who came from the maternity department!! (seriously IT'S FUCKING PAINFULLY) and everything went well (Alhamdulillah) the X-ray show nothing serious than just a sore muscle (HELLO I'M STILL UNABLE TO SIT AND STAND PROPERLY)....

Scene 3.1

------------

While waiting for my dad at the hosp. This cute looking man came and wanted to know me, so we got to know each other and I gave him my number *hey hey hey Valentine is coming up* gahhh~ and he called me and confessed to me that I looked sexy and voluptuous and la la la and he really want to 'be' with me!!! Oyyyyyyy~ So there u go I kept him on HOLD...

p/s - Im sick and I careless on the typo (I'm partially disable)

p/ss- sorry I'm 'away' for quite sometimes, I'm adjusting to my current situation

p/ss- I'm in dilemma should I DATE SOMEONE who STAY in the same CONDO under one roof as I'?

p/sss- meeting guy is cool but when 1/2 of it are into 'illegal' itimacy activity = suxx ok!

p/ssss- I missed my mengaji class for the 2nd time and I dislike the idea,

p/ssss: seating in the car and on a normal chair is harder than making a complete rows of bungalow mockup model (complete with cars and tress and other whatever)

p/ssssss- I'm in pain in various way

p/sssss- yes I make out with someone this aftertoon ehhehehehe wohooo

so berhhh

i'm selectively sober. I'm moving away~ slightly 'cocked-up' and sober.. kiss ass sober (more likely)

C N Y

I'm silently shaking all over my body, I can't manage to see the outcome, yeah no biggie its just me baking Chocolate Fruitcake, I know it sounded so Christmassy, instead I should be baking some steam cake in order to compliment the Oxxy's Chinese New Year. All of sudden I'm challenging myself to bake this chocolaty fruitcake, not a big fan of fruitcake, since the ingredients are prune, raisins, currant and spices, I would love to give a try to this 2 hrs baked cake!!!! Woahhooo

This is my YEAR the YEAR of the OX, I will treasure it silently... Few of my friends asked what is my plan for this C N Y holiday, gah it's only a 2 days off apart from the weekend.. hurm lemme see~

1. i'd be cooking loads of stir fry
2. i'd be making pizza
3. spring cleaning my room (seriousssly)
   
4. make a teaching plan for my students
5. eat more veggies
6. eat more fruits
7. visiting relatives
8. sadly send my bro's bibik home
9. donating stuff
10. cleaning cleaning cleaning
11. another round of cooking
12. after a week off the chocolate (I do sneak some ok!) I want to settle down me self with some good sexy chocolate bite (a pure dark choco)
13. laden me self with a good hearty cheese over any saladddy dish
14. watch porn till I puke
    
15. going out with friends
16. spend more time with my family
17. I'd make love in his jammies, sit on his lap while his reading, let him make do me
    
18. intoxicated with sex
19. repeating activities that include sex food man cooking cleaning

ps: my biggest craving is homemade OLIVE PIZZA with loads of fking olives
pss: man
psss: books

improved

I'm improving my life/lifestyle, my work life, I'm improving, at times it falls down the drain at times it roses itself.. :))

Replaceable

U make it easier when life get hard, I'm lucky, I know I brag too much but I loves my student!!

ps: I'm loading veggies and fruits to my daily LIFE
pss: If u spot someone looking like any type of fruit or vegge, THAT's ME!!
psss: I'm start planning
pssss: I'm focused YET I'm loosing it silently
psssss: I miss kissing/sex/man/more man/sex/no trying any *IM FOCUSED*
pssssss: I managed to 'score' this morning @ PASAR SEGAR, the MAN who me got crush at helped me with my carrier to my car, I'm melting
pssssssss: I'm smelling man everywhere I go esp, at the grocery store this evening aaaaaaaa
psssssssss: I'm 'fasting'

amin...

at last finally with strength and effort im able here to be at masjid s alm, pursuing part of my dream or best to say part of my yearly resolution, learning to well recite the qorun, its always an ongoing dream to learn, this is where the beauty of qorun's grammar is learn and shall the fluency of the pronunciation being taught to improved. I can read the quran as the fluency i sing yre my everything Santa Esmeralda but this isnt like english this is better than Spanish this issss beauty, at times reading it is accompanied by a joyful tears, tears of joy, but i failed to identified the hidden calling hence there is no profound meaning that im hunger to seek the deeper truth behind those powerful magical words that at times swipes mt feet off. Im afloat when im recit …… (lost of words)

Sent from my iPhone

semago berjaya la yer kepada saya, saya KELAS 3 ASAS yer, sebab tajwid saya melongkang, jangan risau kawan2 ada nenek tuh pon join kelas saya~ (ade PERTENGAHAN ngan LANJUTAN sblm grad dapat sijil dan kalau OK - JAIS kasi keje, ngajar Al-Quran)

ps:1000 things to do before I die
pss:aminnnnnnnnnnnn!!!

no reason why!!

We are happy for those wedded couple!! Such as Fergie and whoever-he-is - So we bought cake and celebrate our life (Myself to be exact! life without any string or ring attached!!! wee huu??)

Tq party popper!!! Inclusive 3 maids... and countless kids!! gahhh...

older ::))

I'm getting older, I'm growing graciously yet I'm worried too:: too many worries to be worried, I'm practicing semi-vegetarian diet, yet I'm a pescetarian (eats any combination of vegetables, fruit, nuts, beans and fish or invertebrate seafood, but will not eat mammals or birds. Some animal products like eggs and dairy may or may not be part of a pescetarian diet plan.)
*swear tuhan sih*
Vanilla creme & Pure Seduction all Au natural for my healthy aging process *gahhhh* (Laura Mercier & Victoria's Secret Garden, tq for those concern!!!)

tinggal

hari ini aku pergi dulu ya, izinkan aku pergi sebentar, izinkan aku bersama diriku sebentar, biarkan kosong ini diisi untuk diriku, sepiku bagi diriku, biar ya aku belengu sendiri, aku tak bisa membahayakan diri ini lagi disamping sampingan. Pasti aku merindu, kau mungkin pasti merindu, hanya kepastian belum ada satu ketentuan. Aku hari ini bakal meninggalkan segala yang lepas dilepaskan, semua penciptaan bagiku yang lepas bakal ku tinggal walaupun larutan di tengah jalan, maaf kalau ini mengejut yer. Ini sudah pilihan lama tapi baru dijadikan mungkin sebentar tadi, aku pasti peninggalan aku bermakna. Kalau tiadanya aku, ku pasti aku meninggalkan kamu tanpa sebarang apa nota atau peta jalan carian aku kala aku pergi.
Mungkin ini pemergian bagi satu permulaa.....
Izinya aku pada kamu untuk merindu dan diteruskan oleh keluhan hela nafas yang panjang.

ps:: pemergian yang tiada kepastian
pss: suatu pra-kematian yang sang tidak agung
psss: tiada perancangan
pssss: hey, si lelaki di dalam sut Brioni, kamu akan masih kekal ku kecam di kamar ya!!
psssss: kesudahan dinanti nanti
pssssss: aku pergi dulu ya
psssssss: aku tersedar dari sentakan pemikiran si guru cetek, aku terlupa untuk bercinta dengan aku, aku sedang bercinta, aku sedang belajar memupuk cinta pada diri ini yang semuanya serba serbi kurang, kurang akal, kurang memikir, kurang cantik, kurang tgi, kurang kurus.... satu masa bila semua cinta itu bergerak utUh, pasti aku akan kembali
pssssssss: punat2 nombor sudah tiada

itu kamu~

selamat hari hari cinta baruku
terima cintaku disambut sambut seperti selalu,
aku terima cinta kasih sayang mu lahir zarah putih bersih walau kanvas mu berporeng corak dan warna ,kau masih dirimu, walaupun coraknya masih ku pelajari, tapi azalinya kau adalah ciptaanNya kepadaku
terima kasih cinta, tidak pernah terdetak hati ini untuk merafak kasih cinta bersamamu, sekuat mana setia adanya sebegini,
setiap detik berdetak, aku seakan bernafas nama dan jantungmu, wajah, olesan karikatur hidup dan ambangan suaramu terngiang kuat di jantung ini,
kau nyawaku,
Terima kasih wahai tuhan, mencipta, sinari jalan cinta abadi, suluhan lurah-lurah kasih cinta akhirnya di sisi kamu, mungkin roh kami dah bersaut satu, mungkin jasad tak seutuh roh kami, ikatan sayang kasih dan marah adalah permulaan detik sayang yang lebih utuh.
Mungkin hadir kamu di sisi aku adalah awal rahmat, jalan hapusnya dosa-dosa maksiat aku, suatu 'zina' kekejian yang pernah satu masa merampas maut yang belum pasti dipanggil, kau datang dengan sekelip mata, menyedarkan bahawa senyuman esOk masih ada, kau bergantung jasad-jasad mulus eLok kecil berkerdip di kaki, tangan dan badanku. Ahhha inilah jasad yang kucinta, yang pernah menjernihkan cinta yang keruh di hatiku, yang menarik mengetuk ruang terendak jantung nyawa bergelar cinta dan kasih sayang.
Mungkin ini jalan takdirku, adakah?
berhabis masa didepan mata kecil mu, menghabiskan suara di lohong2 telingamu, tanganmu ku genggam disetiap pagi mengingatkan kamu, JANJI JANJI JANJI ku akan senantiasa bersamamu, pasti akan ku tanamkan zarah-zarah unggul dalam hidupmu agar akhir duniaMu pasti yang terbaik!!...
Ku dengar doa-doa mu, satu ketagihan baru, hanya untuk kau mendoakanKu, runtuh remuk hati ini berganti yang kukuh gaya mortar agung bingkisan juangan juangan pahlawan , :))
Nyawaku, aku tinggalkan satu kegemilangan karier, mencari NUR kasi cinta sejati, di pelosok yang tiada agungnya tapi pasti ada keikhlasan yang abadi, yang aku mencari dan masih mencari~
Pasti setiap zina, maksiat, air cinta yang pasti berdarahkan dosa, JANJI akan ku tebas agar yang tinggal hanya yang tersuci untuk aku mendampingimu dan kau lebih bermakna apabila mendampingiku, mungkin inilah jalan asal dimana ku nanti untuk membersih dosa-dosa aku yang bagiku ada harapan tanpa jalan..........

kau permata kau lah intan di sanubari ku, kau pujaan ku, sinaran rembulan menerangi jiwa- WLZ - my undying bombing energy! Teacher will always love U sugar pump!

awwwwwww me!!!!!

after sev. min. chatting with this whoever.

me:: DO u have YM?

him: what is YM?

me:: YOUR MOTHER!!

him: dah MATI

me:: ????

Happy New Yes - 09 -

HAPPY NEW YEAR!! HAPPY 2009

(cliche?? U asked for it!!)

Happy New Me and Happy New You, may this o9 bring you all the hottest, best and better than before - u - name - it!!!... I know it's later than U've expected, but atleast I'm still here wishing U for your new year.

Thanks for all the wishes, party invi. and sorry for the turn down, gig invi too which I'm unable to attend. I'm wasting my last days of 08 by spending time with the closest ones, I wish to hold them longer so the smell and their memoir shall not fade or keep still. I'm scared there will be no more them and the new them will slowly chased my feeling off them, people change so what! ahahah

Most of the frequent asked question on the new year eve and after too, is how I celebrate/spend my new year .... Well nothing much...

1. 
   
   no club hopping


2. 
   
   no fancy dress - shoes - event


3. 
   
   no sounds blaring gig


4. 
   
   no crowd cladding scene


5. 
   
   no flirting *minor I guess*


6. 
   
   I'm with my friend watching movie *Zombie movie, sux yet LOVELY*


7. 
   
   keep on asking me self, why there are FRU's everywhere, Scary eh


8. 
   
   went to Pelita for Nasi Kandar (I've left N K for years, since I'm becoming a vegetarian again, strictly on 1/1/09, I walloped N K with Ayam Hitam and I did asked those regulars what sort of gravy I should opt for. eheheh)


9. 
   
   hug and kisses


10. 
    
    went around town,


11. 
    
    thats all I'm back with my family members, where undivided love is warmth and never fade away

ps:: part of my new year's resolution is, to become a Vegetarian (I was and stop for some health issue)

psss:: to brush my teeth frequently

pssss:: to practice a basic/good/affordable beauty regime

psssss: and part of it to enjoy life/ to let life enjoy itself (?????)

i'd be missing u owh so much N K....!! and AYAM HITAM esp

Selama hidup ku~

aku suka memasak, untuk sumbat dalam mulut orang - gahhh

meet my buns and my cheesy biscuits... I have no reason why I'm baking..this is the best to channel my current feeling -I don't know, tq-

ps: demi semua yang aku jalani bersamamu

pss: dirimu yang bisa membawa syurga di dalam hatimu

I'm worried

I'm super worried, towards the end of 08, I've dated few guys, I've met them from various background, it's super worrying, because all of them unable to take up challenges, gahhhh this is worryingggg!!!!! it's a fringing simple task and only some are able manage passing thru, this year I've made several chaps cried, reason? ME. why? I don't know, several chap have been orally slashed by my words (darling, I don't used foul lang, even if I'm super mad, I just consult them and spell a big U-R-A-M-A-N on their FOREHEAD, and telling them that is more than having a PENIS), others I can simply tolerate, but this 2 experiences scare me off them :::

---------

This man is directed by ME thru the PHONE to my house in BUKIT JELUTONG (I KNOW this sounds like I'm staying way over behind the shield of place call TOWN or whatever, but I'M not, this is a great place to live, something like retreat area, where serenity is promoted) as this is the 1st time he made ways to my house, so I directed him it's about slightly before 8pm, (HELLO, they do have street light, and shops and signboard to guide to, and DON'T forget on the other hand!! I'M DIRECTING him personally with towel clad to my body and for heaven SAKE my hair is still wet!!!! half way thru, almost reaching my house he commented, he is STRESS and need a break, OK I can TOLERATE this!!!

As he approaching my house, I asked him to wait cause I need to get dressed and get ready, gahhhh... minute after that he called again saying "EXCUSE ME CAN YOU SPEED UP, IT'S DARK AND I'M SCARED" - I'm stunt, and in my mind (GOSH, U R NOT 9 years old, YOU ARE FREAKING OLD, and U ARE AFRAID OF THE DARK) mannn what happen to the streetlight??? gahhhhh

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recently (about 15 min ago) 4 pm (take note)

while I'm having my nap, someone called, and willing to meet, brag my ass out telling me he wanted to see me, it's OK even it's a 5 min date-in-front-of-my-gate, I said ok and continue napping, 15 min before arrival he called me, I had my shower when he called ~

(The same thing happen), but different chap, almost-reaching-my house, in fact the houses he told me shows that is it close to MY HOUSE, it's almost there (and I'm still directing him) and he told me "I'M SUPER BLUR, STRESSED and shall we meet some other time" - I said (OK) (HISTORY)

ps: now I'm settling down eating pickles with H2O

pss: this answers all YOUR Q, why I'm seriously unattached!

psss: what happen to all this penises holder? aren't u supposed to be the one holding maps and navigate the treasure hunt, you you you, once a tribal leader and someone trusted to be FATHERED someone waaaaaaa.. I'm scared...

pssss: those chaps are older than me and they are what?? 29?? 26 even!! (not freaking 50)

psssss: I need some new excitement!!

pssssss: isn't easy to win a movie with gahhhhhhhhhhh (SAY IT OUT LOUD)

I'M not a cat person, but meet OUR cat CANTIKA ASHLYN (I heard its a HE)

ps: without any reason I'm placing Ashlyn's on board!

sun day =))

"Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away" - when everyone left home for swimming (inclusive the kids) I was alone with the 2 maids and my nanna, he came to me, I was still groggy in my disgusting Baju Kelawar, he is still the same the well dressed (board short + T) tak mandi I don't bother to take a shower or do anything, I'm stunt when he arrived, well this is me messy me, (take it or leave it) we had fun, we played catch and hide and seek, yeah unusual activity for the grown up, but who cares? this is it, at one point we are clashing with James Ingram and Dolly Parton on the other hand we are playing hide and seek, ~ love struck ~

I made froggy looking pancake for brunch... we ate and spend times, watching TV, and be in each other arms, and watch Hentai *grrrrrrrrrr*

DO IT with Nutella,Peanut B, Jammyy or Sambal *love ya muahs*

when you're gone ~ =``((

ps:: that is not a Babi face ok *it's "halal"*

diam diam

keadaan/perkara yang boleh buat aku berhenti dari melakukan sesuatu yang sedang dilakukan...

(online)

dia:: hi dah mandi ??

aku: belom, mampu gosok gigi jer

dia:: anak dara kalau mandi lewat sampai bila2 tak ada orang nak kawin dengan dia

aku: (habis orang kat kutub2 sana yang x mandi sebab sejuk, kawin jek, takde pon x kawin, KURAFAT ke neh) - ada kerja/pelajaran/scandal

dia:: ada bf tapi tak kawin takde makne nyer

aku: (diam) ok NEXT!

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dia:: hai dah bfast

aku: baru celik mata

dia:: tak tolong mak ke, kesian dia sorang2 kat dapo

aku: dia keluar

dia:: pg la masak meggi ke ape ke

aku: dia keluar cari makanan

dia:: awak orang kaya, saya orang miskin kita berbeza, cara hidup pun berbeza -

aku: ?????

dia:: eh awak suka masuk dapur tak?? reti masak Asam Pedas tak

aku: http://www.mesra.net/ (ok TATA??)

------------------------------------------

dia:: hai makan apa pg ni

aku: nak masak Pancake

dia:: reti ke?

aku: yup

dia:: macam mana nak kirim kat saya?? saya nak rasa juga

aku:: pergila berdoa, semoga tuhan tunjuk arah ke kedai makan

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(rumah)

dya:: Sumaaaa, di mana Ais yang ibu beli tadi??

dia:: ini, ini disiniiiii, saya letak di sini tadi, iya iyya
(SAMBIL tunjuk di TEMPAT sayur)

dya:: perhati glazier ais mengalir
(Blah terusssssss)

-----------------------------------

(TADIKA)

teacher:: ok tolong warnakan gambar pokok

dia:: saya tak bawak kaler,

teacher:: pinjam/beli/curi

ps:: lebih baik diam

ennui

Pt 1

I met someone ONLINE *ah ha* who I guess is fun to get to know to, guy 1 is an Indian who works @ Pos Malaysia, guy 2 is same age with me *only god knows why I chose to chat with him, I usually go for someone much much OLDER and easily know who is JAMES INGRAM and DOLLY PARTON* he told me he is a Pilot, and guy 3 is a Ghanaian who studied @ UM *never in my life, IM still asking WHY*, everything went well with them, I'm ignoring the guy 3, eheh I don't know why, I don't know!!!!!!! gahh!!!!!!!
After a generous goodbye and planning to meet for a 'typical date' with guy 1 and a constantly ignoring Abu the Ghanaian, I went on with guy 2...

Something so cliche, traumatized and unbearably ennui but yet so addictive, I've dated a Pilot before way back when I'm still wearing a school uniform (White and Light Blue) *ah haa* I understand P-I-L-O-T in the consistency of 90/10 ahahha, but this boy *ok hard to be called a MAN* starts talking/blabbing about relationship *obviously with ME* and getting to know me -
less than 3 hrs knowing each other, and minutes on the phone *insufficient credit* -amazingg PILOT eh!!- he said he likes me and willing to get serious *ok OK I still can manage this* but when he said he wanted to asked me TO BE HIS WIFE *I stillll manage to reply* -I slowly start to accept Abu Ghana *I called him Abu Ghana*- at the same time my tummy is churning the whole IDEA of MARRIAGE - ENGAGEMENT- PROPOSAL - ahhhh gahhhh

(I've been in this kind of situation OK, and once I'm drown into this WEDDING PLAN MANIAC thingy, and It was kind of cute at first and head over heels but It won't last *the way U IMAGINE* blahhhh, so I'm good at handling things like this)

Ok so I said -
me:: Since u dead fuck serious, Y don't U come and meet me tomorrow !!

him: Owh soooorrryyy sayang (dear) I have something to do, I have to go to BB PLaza (some mall) to buy somethingggg... some other times ok

me:: Owh OK -was half way chatting with Abu Ghana-

him: tqqqqqqqqqqqq I love uuuuu, I really want u to be my wife, and I really LIKE YOU

me:: aaaaaa I GOT TO GO, I'm about to bath my GOLD FISH (3 a.m)

him: why why, okhhhayy ddddear I want tttoooo sleeepppp

me:: (hit the RED BUTTON on yr upper RIGHT @ YM) tata HISTORY

Pt 2

After a long chat with Abu Ghana, and an endless laughter, HE IS FK FUNNY, just what I needed!! ahah, and he show me his picture ...

him: show me his PIC *framed with hearts and flowers*

me:: U are SCARY

him: u r kidding rite,

me:: seriously U R

him & me :: managed to sort things out, and continue our laughter and whatever more, no no no nothing got to do with the S thingy!! PLSSSSSSSSSS NOOOOOOOO - went on till 4 a.m and sadly I have to say goodbye to Abu Ghana cause I'm about to hit the BUNK
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Woke up 4 hrs later and able to make Double Choc Chocolate Chip Cookies & Sweetcorn Chowder with Nachos and Cheeseee, (sober and able to hit the RECIPE with flying color,EAT ME)

sober and making!!! RED RUM utensils

ku pernah punya cinta, namun kini ku suka kamu, cinta ku dlu telah ku buang jauh,-Jadi sebab itu saya kirimkan sup ini kedepan!!